Chemofuckingtherapy

The Whiny Post

So yeah, chemo round 3 has been pretty sucky.  All three rounds so far have sort of had their own personalities: round one made me depressed and feeling sorry for myself; round two was a relative cake walk; and round three has made me impatient – like, I can’t believe I have another three rounds to go.

whine.jpgPeople have sometimes compared what I’m going through with what my lovely grandmother went through. I have heard people marvel that even when Grandma felt truly lousy, if someone asked her how she was, she would say, “I’m fine, thank you”; always a lady. Yesterday I had a minor social engagement in polite company and when asked how I was feeling I burst out, “Crappy. I feel crappy.” So much for being a lady – at least I did not say “I feel like the shit on a pig farmer’s boot.” (Need to work on my rustic colloquialisms.)

Ok, ok, it’s not that bad – I don’t mean to be a drama queen. But the side effects are worse this time than they have been so far. I’m not quite having full-blown nausea, but the indigestion is worse. And I am starting to notice some minor peripheral neuropathy that I’ve been warned about – a little tingling here and there, especially at my finger tips.

I’m still managing everything pretty well; the drugs still work, and the naps are still pretty epic. Yesterday I overdid it a little but made up for it today by lying in bed, reading, and generally relaxing – and enjoying some good company. But it’s frustrating and I’m glad I’m nearly over the hump. Three down, three to go…!  (I’m still not declaring it halfway yet – let’s wait for the whininess to be over first.)

4 thoughts on “The Whiny Post

  1. Go ahead and whine! There is light at the end of the tunnel…..tell people you feel shitty, it’s ok! If they don’t want to hear the answer, they shouldn’t ask the question! Love you…..

    Like

  2. You are a “Lawson” and like your grandfather, your great aunts and maybe me (although what I went through is appearing more and more like a walk in the park compared to your regimen), you’ll bull your way through and come out on top in the end. The journey however, may be bumpy, rocky, unpleasant, but I have not the least bit of doubt that you will make it even if you have to scratch, bite, crawl, clench your fists and grit your teeth to reach the light at the end of the tunnel. Love Dad

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s